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:. May 04, 2016
I saw Larry Wilmore's speech at the White House correspondence dinner and it inspired me to write hundreds of black jokes, which I promptly stuffed into the racist vault, never to be re-opened. Probably every joke has some bigotry in it except for that one guy who thinks he's funny by telling overly polite politically correct jokes that people laugh at just to be nice, but really no one is surprised he still lives with his parents at 50 and uses suspenders and has those weird hairs that grow on the tip of the nose or odd places that you can't see without a high-tech mirror.

Anyways, I'm working on a comic to follow-up the prostitute comic I made for V-day. I'm pissed I missed so many holidays this year. I've never done one about the superbowl, missed Spring Break, haven't done anything for May 4th and will probably skip Cinco de Mayo (fake holiday). I don't get paid to do this crap so really there isn't much reason to keep going other than personal interest. Where once I was a bright young little shit with many ideas now I'm becoming a constantly angry prick, who is more angry than angry-funny, and it seems like everyone wants to trick me into getting married and having children to cheer up, but in reality we all know that makes life worse. I'd say being poor and young is probably better than being rich and old because you can't really fake the two years of getting out of highschool and feeling freedom for the first time before 40 years of work and bills make suicide seem like a sweet nectar. I don't give a shit about living in a giant mansion, but a luxury car would be nice, although waking up to leave for work at 9AM combined with traffic is the worst miserable Hell that ever existed. John Milton couldn't conjure up a worse nightmare. The hopeless paperwork and the microcliques that keep the dream alive of being popular and mean around the watercooler. That one guy who couldn't stop partying like it was college and got fired and is just sad now. That hot chick who used to be hot for like one month and now wears two pounds of makeup just to pretend it covers up the ugliness but it doesn't.

It's hard to be funny when people are jumping out of windows, but I try to laugh for us all as they plunge to their death. Honestly, in all seriousness I don't even consider many things humor-worthy. On open-mic nights many times I'll just read a poem, or play an instrument. The funny clowns try to hide their scars, but we all know deep down they are crying and like that stupid joke Rorschach said 'did you hear about the one where a guy went to see a therapist to cheer up and he told him to see a clown. but he replied, doc I am that clown.' Rorschach was never that funny in Watchmen. Boy not too many good movies out right now. Do 8-year old boys have a lot of money? Why do movie studios have such a huge budget for all these superhero movies. I saw Matthew Broderick kiss another man in some cheesy adult movie while I was hoping for a topless scene. That will make seeing Ferris Bueller weird from now on, but I never liked that movie. You can't have a scene where someone tries to commit suicide inside a comedy, unless it's funny and in that movie it wasn't supposed to be funny. It ruined the entire genre. The whole movie was a comedy up until that point and it ruined the whole film.

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